Thursday, April 12, 2012

Adjusting to Domesticity: Leaving...

I'm loving these "Adjusting to Domesticity" blogs :) They're fun to write and share our experiences of early married life and what we've learned. So when the mood hits me, I'm going to continue to add to this series.

My husband doesn't travel for work often but when he does it is so hard for me to let him go. Near the end of last year, he had to travel more often than not. In fact, he was traveling for 11 out of the 14 days after Thanksgiving. I missed him terribly even though I knew he was traveling for good reasons and it would give me time to work on my own projects.

This time around, he left the afternoon of Easter. But this is only the start of things. There will be at least one trip per month from now until September and sometimes multiple trips in a month. In fact, there's a chance he could be gone for up to half of a month since he'll be traveling for both of his projects at work.

I've learned though that I need to keep myself busy. Moping around the apartment does neither of us any good and is counterproductive. Some of my favorites are getting uninterrupted time to work on crafting projects and things around the home. After I dropped him off with his co-worker this past Sunday, I ate, got my Sunday afternoon nap (a must most weeks), and then took off! I got my gardening set for the moment, moved laundry around, unloaded/reloaded/re-ran the dishwasher, made dinner, and even had a little time to watch an episode of "Jeeves and Wooster" (fun, British, Stephen Fry/Hugh Laurie comedy that Dan introduced me to). The following days have been slightly less productive (work kinda gets in the way) but you get the idea. :) I've even been able to try some new recipes that I knew Dan wouldn't enjoy but I loved.

But the hard times hit as well, even if I feel like I've been holding it together pretty well. I broke down one night after not hearing my husband's voice for almost 48 hours and only getting to chat for two minutes because they were still working on something. And he found out they were going to have to stay an extra day which always puts a damper on my hopes for a speedy reunion. I once told a friend who is a military wife that I don't know how she does it and she told me that the first week is always the hardest. So while I'm glad his trips are short, it also means I'm reliving the worst part of the separation each time he has a trip.

Overall, though, keeping busy has been the most helpful thing I've done during Dan's trips. Find something that you enjoy, something you don't always get to do and run with it. Periods of separation are hard, but the reunion is always sweet. It can be easy to get bogged down in the emotions and situation but God gives us situations for a reason and works them together for our good.

Now...please excuse me while I go prepare for Dan's return tomorrow! :D

Soli Deo Gloria,


Taylor said...

Oh, sweetie, that must be so hard! God will make good out of it though and someday you'll look back and smile at all you learned these days! Doesn't make it easier in the moment, though. :(

Shamrock said...

I think you are doing all the right things. I've done the long separation,s, and we just finishes an assignment where he was constantly in and out. The kids and I use the time to do the things we never had time to do bf. We keep busy and plan lots of fun trips and projects to keep us anticipating all the time. W live or lives according to out own schedule and then drop everything and enjoy
when he is home. It works or. Reunions are the best. and it is much harder to tasker each other for granted! Pardon the spelling. This is from my phone.